Our apartment has been undergoing some pretty intense construction this past week. My Mother in Law bought us furniture for the nursery (very generous, and so sweet of her), so boxes arrived early last week ready for assembly. However, because we do live in an apartment with awkward shaped rooms, we had to make a trip to Ikea to make some adjustments to current furniture in order to accomodate the new nursery furniture. Basically, the current queen sized bed that was taking up the majority of our guest bedroom had to be switched to a daybed that converted into a full sized bed so that we could turn guest bedroom into a dual nursery. So, on Saturday, we bought a space friendly daybed. We also decided to buy a sectional couch, which really had nothing to do with Baby Krongard except that we wanted more comfortable seating in our living room. As you remember, my precious Crate and Barrel couch is no longer with us.

Then we stood in the Home Delivery line (more like Bryant stood in the line while I sat on a bench playing Words with Friends). This line was 45 minutes long, you would think that Ikea would be more efficient, but for some reason it was taking a ridiculously long time. All of a sudden I hear what sounded like fighting. I look over, and these two guys are ghetto style talking down to each other. One of them is cussing like crazy, and the other guy just keeps saying “You feel stupid! Admit it!” Then I hear “BOOOOO!!!!!!” from the crowd of people. I text Bryant and say “what is with that fight?” and he said “Someone cut. I booed them.” I walked over and rejoined the line, because I didn’t want to miss the action. Apparently, a couple was standing in line for awhile and then left the line. They left the line for a solid 15 minutes, then came back and thought they could just jump right in front. The guy in front of Bryant was not happy. He said “You can’t just cut the line.” Guy says “Its ok. We were in line before.” Other guy says “But you left. The right thing to do would be to go to the back of the line.” Cutter Guy says “But we were here before, its fine” and then turns around. Other guy says “You feel stupid that is why you just turned around.” Cutter Guy turns back around “I don’t feel f****** stupid!” Other guy says “Yes you do. That is why you turned around. You feel stupid” Cutter Guy is cussing. Other guy “That is why you are using foul language, you feel stupid.” Meanwhile, Bryant is yelling “WE HAVE CUTTERS! BOOOOO!!! BOOOO!!!!!” My husband likes to heckle people, and rally people, so pretty soon the whole line is involved. The situation cooled down a bit, but the cutters were still at the front getting helped. As the Guy who was in front of us is leaving, Bryant and I start a slow clap. Bryant yells “Thanks for sticking up for the line!!” and the whole line starts clapping for him. This did not make the cutters very happy. As Guy is walking out the door he turns to the cutters and says “STUPID!” and then Cutter Guy goes crazy cussing again.

Anyway, our furniture was delivered that night. I wish I could say this made me happy. While I was happy with our purchases, I was not happy that even our couch was in a thousand pieces. It took us 2 hours to assemble our couch. Sunday, it took us from 9am to 6pm to assemble the daybed. The screws were stripping when we tried to screw them in causing some serious problems. At 1pm we contemplated throwing all of it into the car and driving it back to Ikea to return it. Somehow we found the will to power through. So it is assembled, though I’m not 100% convinced that its structurally sound. Bryant’s Mom is sleeping on it this weekend and then my parents will be sleeping on it next weekend, so we will see if they fall through in the middle of the night. I don’t think they will, I mean Bryant and I both tested it out, but there was a lot of “do not lay like this” pictures in the manual.

Ikea is kind of an illusion. While the prices are great, it isn’t really worth it. Our couch rules so I won’t speak badly about that, but this bed, if it doesn’t fit back out the door when we decide to move, I told Bryant he can beat the shit out of it with a sledge hammer.