I thought about a random childhood memory, and thought I should analyze it out loud (or in this case, type it).

For some reason, whether it is because I am female, or simply a very detailed person, growing up, I always “attempted” to manage a list containing my various outfit assignments for the week. This could be a normal thing, or maybe a not so normal thing, but I would plan out in a notebook what I was going to wear everyday that week down to my underwear.

For Example:

Monday: Red Tanktop, Beige Sweater to Layer, Gap Jeans (the ones I like), brown flip flops, red beaded necklace (the long one), hoop earrings (small and large for holes 1 and 2), boy shorts (check washer), strapless bra (laundry?)

Yes, my list was THAT detailed. And of course I never actually stuck to the list, it was more of an idea that I tried to accomplish. I think that I thought I was cooler if I knew what I was going to wear everyday, and also remember what I wore everyday, thus avoiding the embarrassing question from your BFF “Didn’t you wear that shirt on Monday?”

Nowadays, I plan nothing. I wake up at the last possible minute, my so called attempt at accessorizing involves a scarf (I wear one everyday), and I rush out the door. Although sometimes I have the urge to look more “put together,” on these days I am generally 5 minutes late.

Call me crazy, but I think I am rebelling against my childhood ways on purpose but I don’t think it is necessarily beneficial. Subconciously, I think that I want to be that person who is just “too cool to care.” Its almost cooler to be the dirty girl who doesn’t shower, than the clean girl who takes an hour to get ready everyday. Maybe this is me trying to be one of those artsy people who don’t need to shower? (you see, I am an artist…) Or maybe I’m making too much of this in general. I want to care more.

On another weird note, I think that I really am looking forward to motherhood. I promise you, this is a long way off (3 years AT LEAST), but I tend to catch myself picturing whatever I am wearing on myself, but as a pregnant self. And I think “aw I’m going to be a cute pregnant lady” or “whoa, I have to put this in a tub so I don’t wear this when I’m pregnant”

I think that I can come down to one conclusion from this blog of randoms…I am the type that overanalyzes.

Lately, I have become very aware of how fast my life has gone by. Everyday feels like its moving at light speed and I feel like I can’t catch my breath.

The other day, I was talking with my closest friend, and we were talking about this very thing because I am uncomfortable with it. My life is going by way too fast. My friend was saying “Remember when we were in junior high and were like, oh I can’t wait until high school and we will be so cool, and then we got into high school and we were like gosh college is going to be so great and we are going to be awesome and so mature! And then we were like, oh I can’t wait until we get married and have husbands and it will be so amazing, what happened?”

This is EXACTLY how I feel. Not that none of these events were memorable, they all are, and I am definitely enjoying being married but it feels like it shouldn’t be real because it all came and went so fast.

I officially have a job at “my work” in which I am compensated for, and this week made me want to freak out because every day went by so fast, but not only that, everyday was EXACTLY the same. I don’t think I was prepared by anyone for the routine that you suddenly experience when you enter the real world and have a real job and work everyday at the same time and go home at the same time and eat dinner at the same time and then go to bed and do it all over again. This routine is making me depressed, because I remember a time when everyday was so unpredictable and I would do something different everyday, and if I decided to do the same thing (like go to Starbucks and read, or hike, or whatever) it was my choice. My choice has been taken from me; I’m not saying I don’t love my job, I do, I really do, but this routine really sucks and I don’t know what to do about it.

So I think I am going to start brainstorming new hobbies and activities that I can do to make my life more exciting and not so much of a routine. I don’t think I like routines, I didn’t know this about myself until now, but I really don’t like it.

So, if you have any ideas, shoot them my way…this is an emergency, because I might wake up tomorrow and 2 more years will have passed and I’ll be like “Where is my life, and what happened to that blog with my new hobbies to break this terrible routine!” This may all sound dramatic, but I don’t care, I’m upset about this.

I’m not going to mention names, because that could just make things weird, so instead I’m going to call this person Helga. Helga has 2 kids, and Helga is one of the most fantastic people I have ever met. Although crazy and insane the majority of the time, Helga has a very contagious presense about her. If you meet Helga, you will always want to be around Helga, even though you fear Helga’s outbursts, you can always count on Helga for adding some fun humor to your life. Back to Helga having 2 kids; Helga’s kids names are outrageously fantastic as well, I will mention their names because why disguise how creatively put together these names are. Helga’s daugher is 4 years old and her name is Alberta. Alberta is sometimes referred to as “Ali” but I always refer to Alberta as Alberta because what a sophisticated name for only being 4 years old. Helga’s son’s name is Buck. I am assumming this is short for something, but whatever it is short for doesn’t matter because he is always referred to as Buck. Buck is 8 years old, and I think he is awesome because his name is Buck.

Helga likes to go on crazy rants about things that are weird, and she lets her kids watch Edward Scissorhands, and she also lets her kids have “underwear wars”  they take all of the underwear out of their drawers and throw them at eachother. They also play games called “old woman” Buck pretends that he is a blind old lady and walks around with his eyes closed and a stick in his hand (channeling the old woman cane of course) and hunts for Alberta. This game alone shows the creativty that children possess.

Helga likes things to be a certain way, and she likes voicing her opinion, and she also likes to behave eratically when the markets are eratic. Thankfully for me, the markets are crazy right now with this economy that we have so Helga behaves eratically most of the time. If the markets are up she buys lots of weird things like $100 shower curtains and purple bath rugs, and dog sweaters…when the markets are down, Helga yells a lot and says shes going to get rid of the cleaning lady, in result, Helga will sweep the floors and clean the bathrooms on days when the market is down. Helga likes yoga and she also is really into Feng Shui. Helga drinks Bailey’s in her coffee and has a tomato garden. Helga sometimes takes part in illegal business practices, but its all about strategy, and money, and progress.

The thing is, I really like Helga. Not many people like her all the time, but I really, honestly do. Even if she yells at me, or gets upset and goes crazy. I think that Helga just makes my life so much more exciting. I’m starting to realize that I should write a book about her; although, I’m afraid that she would think that I am trashing her, although I am not in anyway. I really think that she is exciting! I’ve always been the kind of person who meets crazy people and has weird things happen to her or around her which has made me become quite the story teller. I feel like Helga is the best encounter I have had yet, and because I encounter Helga so often, I feel like I NEED to write about her.

The Adventures of Helga, Alberta and Buck. I know you would read it. I would read it! And then you would be asking yourself what will Helga do next?